Actually, I’ve been trying to justify my actions last night, which means looking through what my seniors had done to me when I was their age. I’m done getting angry, cos either way, they lose. And I still feel I’ve done nothing wrong, at all.

So, if I were to do what they had done at their age, then we will have to complain about May, Sanah, Yunqi, Andreas, Jasmine, Huiying, Priscilla, Yinghui, Xueying and the other seniors who came back for the camp to supposedly “torture” us. That would have driven them away too.Even at that age, we will never do that. Sure, it was tough, and even if we didn’t understand the meaning of the punishments, it did bond us together. And if you want to see, I still have the (nightdrill) video to prove it. And my blog entries to prove that I didn’t have that mindset that the sec 3s are having now,3 years ago. The people who got supposedly “tortured”? They are the same people who are coming back to help out. And they got pinpointed out during the nightdrill, that I can tell you. In front of May and Xueying, that’s pretty scary. And we weren’t like that, I can cross-reference to Andreas’s blog to see how we were back then too. Wanna try COH 1 Saturday every month? We all paid our dues already, 100000 times worse than what you all are paying now. Now, who’s suffering? Wanna try ours then?Since “now” doesn’t work, let’s try “then”.

Oh, then I realized why. Cos those sec 3s never go for this year’s camp, that why. Which means, in my words, they never did “die” before. For sec 3s, attending the training camp is so important, and yet none of them turned up, tell you, bravo, I never heard of this before. Or it is a signal to tell me not to habour anymore hopes on you all? If there is no effort, you still expect a reward? That’s completely bullshit.

Yet, they blame our incompetency and doubt our capabilities. If they think so, then they should have attended everything to see how “incompetent” and “incapable” we are. And if they think they are sooooo capable, then, let them handle everything. I will be at the watching the “show” at the sidelines.

Oh yes, all the seniors can just give up on you and we all can take the Fridays and weekends to concentrate on our schoolwork, instead of burning it for people that do these things to us. In turn, you all will not learn any guiding knowledge and we will improve our grades. How nice is that. I’m not even asking for appreciation and gratitude. I will be fine with enthusiasm. FYI: I wouldn’t stoop so low to your level.